#transcalendar – It’s time to for me to ‘come out’ too!

I have a secret to tell – and it’s not an easy one to share – I’m now coming out as ‘trans’

All my life I’ve felt alone and that something was wrong with me.

I just didn’t fit in with others while they were going on and on about how wonderful their lives were because of their … Star Signs.

What? That tacky copy paste Daily Mail tabloid site was prattling on about Star Signs again today. They repeat the same crap aboat once per month.

Usually I skip over that BS to the next BS … but with all that trans BS in the news every other day, I thought … hey, why not create a transcalendar too?

My idea is winning in the DM comments…

Doesn’t effect me, as I don’t have a star sign. I’m transcalendar. If we can change genders, then obviously we can change calendars too. My chosen calendar is based on my home brew beer fermenting cycles. -Happy Bob (wink wink)

Supposedly … I’m supposed to be a ‘quite shy Virgo’.

That’s Birthophobic!

I’m no ‘neat, shy, quite Virgo’ … far from it.

To adjust to my new freedom from pre determined stereotypes, I’m working on a Transcalendar Identity (TCI) that will be based on a “year” of home brewing and required batches.

Currently I don’t have a brewing kit. I don’t eat paper either, yet people still hang those oppressive ‘star sign calendars’ up.

Each batch is 30 litres and takes two weeks to ferment and bottle 24 x 750ml tallies.

At the rate I drink, I need 24 tallies for one week. (1 batch)

Instead of months, I have ‘batches’

52 weeks in the star-sign oppressive “calendar year” means my transcalendar would be based on 4 batches per “month”.

Hydrometers aren’t Birthophobic!

Thus, my Transcalendar Identity (TCI) consists of 48 batches per year.

Each ‘batch’ will be named ‘batch 1’, ‘batch 2’ .. and on.

You’re in month one, 20th of January – I’m in ‘batch 3’ (3/48th’s through the year)

Every 48 ‘batches’ I celebrate my birthday.

It’s not my fault I was born in September!

Providing I don’t kill my liver, this system is fool proof, and I won’t have to live under an oppressive “star sign” system of perceived pre-birth personality traits.


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9 Thoughts to “#transcalendar – It’s time to for me to ‘come out’ too!”

  1. the former artist formally known as the bush

    What a great idea to sync your fermentation cycles to your periods
    ok so I didnt read the whole thing but glad you have decided to brew your own beer
    Ditch the bottles and go for a keg system – beer on tap straight from the fridge…
    not sure of the process to brew fruity lexia..?

    1. Didn’t read it? Point was, there are oppressors using the main-stream-calendar deciding our personality traits before we’re even born. You were born in November? Before you were born, some pagan ass-holes high on narcotics decided you’re a deadly creature from Jurassic Park called a ‘scorpion’. With Transcalendar Identity (TCI) freedom, those born in November are called ‘Stubbies’. Those born in this time of ‘3rd batch’ (aka late January) will have the TCI of ‘Schooners’. TCI doesn’t look to the sky for fantasy ideas. With all the city lights, we can’t see the stars anymore, anyway. TCI looks at items found in a good Irish pub. In between hang overs, I’ve yet to write the complete list. Fellow TCI’s are welcome to contribute. 300+ likes for the idea on that DM post so far and it’s the top comment overall. Stop being a predictable bug, be an unpredictable TCI born in the sign of Stubbie!!!

  2. the former artist formally known as scorpio

    I like bugs especially scorpions – I can see him in the night sky looking down upon me from above – like a protector or guardian.
    However I also like stubbies….
    perhaps I too am trans as I have often felt like a stubby in a mans body
    where do I sign up?

    1. Nice try, but don’t deny who you really are! You were spotted again the other night with Towelie. Stubbie Bush

  3. the former artist formally known as the bush

    LOL I love it – however you obviously have way too much time on your hands….
    ‘Towelie and the Schooners’ had a better ring to it
    how does Mr XXXXgold operate his distortion pedal (the pink 1) without legs…?
    Is it too early in the week for some Rompa Room spam…?

    Vallies are launching their debut single “Anchor” at The Rompa Room on Friday 24th January 2020. Rising from the ashes of Gold Coast and Northern Rivers bands, Vallies are a band in their infancy hoping to achieve big things. They will be supported by alt-rock band Anarchy Hearts, Brissy groove grunge trio The New Calm, and blues/rock trio VERUM.
    (Back room at the Hinterland Hotel)
    Friday 24th January, 2020
    FREE ENTRY / 8PM / 18+
    The Rompa Room is Gold Coast’s newest live music venue. Every Friday night we will have Original, Local & Touring Bands playing Live at The Rompa Room… and its all Free!
    Located in a convenient central location at the Hinterland Hotel, just off the M1 in Nerang. Only 15 mins from the beach, 15 mins from the mountains and a short walk from the Nerang train station.
    8.00PM – Verum
    9.00PM – Anarchy Hearts
    10.00PM – The New Calm
    11.00PM – Vallies

    1. There’s feet. You high again? Put your glasses on and refresh the page.

  4. the former artist formally known as the bush

    only feet I can see are at the base of the mic stand…
    its an overdrive pedal actually – not simply distortion like a guitarist….

  5. the former artist formally known as the bush

    yer i tried all of them still no stubby feet

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